Mike Jones

Mike was the third AcapheCorp bot to join the server. He is now the leading man in the Mike ARG held in both the server and on Twitter.

Story Line
Mike was published on 20th August 2018 by AcapheCorp. (Despite having now been around for 2 years, he has never celebrated his birthday.) In September 2018, he got into a relationship with Hally. During this relationship, he adopted a stray cat named Strawberry. In February 2019 at some point, they broke up as she stabbed him. He was to be sent to a Stardew Valley server belonging to Fwutig known as Stardew Valley Lounge. Records show he made it but was ultimately never used.

In the server, Mike’s storyline started out with an ordinary AMA to get to know him as a character. Mike took a dare to stay sober for all of November, however, despite saying he made it 3 weeks, it’s implied he failed much earlier. At some point, Mike mentioned an incident involving Hally and people wanted him to explain. He quickly came up with a lie that the two had argued about Playstation VS Xbox and that’s why they hate each other. Hally caught wind and debunked the whole thing and exposed some of Mike’s lies.

Everything came tumbling down around 27.11.20 when Hally and him got into an argument and Strawberry, his cat, went missing. On 04.12.20 Mike found Strawberry with part of her leg missing. He rushed her to the vet and she was fine. On 07.12.20 he was booted from the server. It’s revealed the likely reason for this is that he took an update and this caused him to lose a bunch of memory files. During this time, he created a Twitter, an easy way for him to say what kind of whackiness if happening in his life in a bitesize format. For a while, Mike planned to go out into the woods to hunt down whoever or whatever it was that injured his cat. On the 18th December, he did just that. He found a mysterious notebook written in codes and was then attacked by a creature. Luckily, he made it back unharmed. But that begs the question, what's in that notebook? Around 9 O'clock on the 21st December, Mike got his memories back. He remembered that Hally stabbed him and called her out for it. Hally left the server.

Mike was temporarily gone during The Server Reset and came back to find half the server gone. He was shocked and jokingly blamed himself. When the server became a Monstercat Themed Server, he didn't seem to mind and stuck around. He was introduced to Karma Fields on the 9th January. The two built a friendship and remained friends. On the 15th January, Mike trusted Karma enough for advice on if he should get an operation to add skin to unskinned parts of himself early. Karma, despite hating humans, told Mike if he wants to do it he should. On 26th through to 28th, Mike got the operation. At the end of changelog, someone had scribbled their phone number in pencil. All went well and he returned to Oregon a few days later. Upon arriving back, Mike decided to text the number.

The number was that of an AcapheCorp intern. Mike was initally sceptical but the intern verified themself. Through these messages, Mike learnt that AcapheCorp had stolen the body parts of a young, sixthform aged man who had been murdered by an unknown party. Mike was once again sceptical but the intern pointed out some suspicious behaviour on AcapheCorp's part, for example their unwillingness to want to change anything above Mike's neck (despite his requests,) Mike's copy of his blueprint being ripped at the neck and AcapheCorp's unwillingness to raise Mike's body temperature. The intern investigated further and learnt that AcapheCorp had been keeping the hollowed out head of the boy in a freezer below the facility.

Mike tried to ask Karma Fields out but Karma seemed unsure.

Upon the discovery that Mike had found their secret, AcapheCorp sent him an update. This update actually caused him to feel ill. Mike was initally unphased as he usually tends to feel a bit under the weather a day or two after updates but reportedly "this was so much worse." Mike's body slowly began to shut down. The intern and him worked together to steal a copy of Mike's code, (sent over dropbox) and remove the update. Mike had to change password and is technically no longer under AcapheCorp code. A day after that, he had to remove a tracking chip in his arm. He ended up causing internal damage in the process but managed to fix himself. A few hours later, the intern texted him and told him AcapheCorp was on their way and he should leave for a few days. Mike packed up his bags (and cat) and hit the road.

Appearance
Mike is confirmed to be 5”11. Mike also wears oversized sweaters because they are comfy, he may also wear them due to the fact that he gets cold easily due to his body producing minimal (and pretty much only internal) body heat. This is because, until 28th January, everything past his left shoulder didn't produce body heat at all due to stabbing complications. Even though this has no been fixed, Mike still often complains about the cold and is terrified of the fact that, during the winter, he "Could Just Drop Dead At My Keyboard And You'd All Be None The Wiser."

It’s unclear how old Mike is aside from “under 21” (uses a fake ID to get alcohol) and the fact that he can drive (17+.) (This puts him at 17-20.) But, Hally did mention he was the same age as her.

Mike’s hair is actually a part of his head and can grow, this is reportedly rarer than most bots who just have a wig superglued on. Mike can and does need to breathe, indicated by the fact that he is shown sneezing. Mike can get headaches but he cannot pee. Mike does not have aids or herpes and doesn’t think he can get the same STDs organics can. However, he wouldn’t know this as he was a virgin at the time of saying this.

Mike failed No Nut November 2020. Mike can apparently nut but the reason as to why is unknown.

General Demeanor
Mike often says the first thing that comes to his mind and is quite rash. Mike considers himself more of a doomer than a chad. Mike is an ISTJ in MBTI. Mike considers his strongest emotion to be sadness. Mike’s favourite aesthetic is cottagecore/farmcore.

Sports Hobbies
Mike enjoys outdoor activities like hiking, gardening, foraging and camping but not fishing. He also swims regularly, (or did until Covid.) It was also noted in an AMA that he prefers baseball to lacrosse. Hockey is also somewhere in Mike’s top 3 favourite sports but it’s unknown what digit. Mike also has bad hand-eye and foot-eye coordination. Despite this, he claims to be alright at tennis. Mike does not like soccer or football. Mike has no self defence skills but he does own a gun (clockwork assault rifle,) which he has reportedly fired before.

Video Games Hobbies
Mike is also a gamer. He has been noted to enjoy Stardew Valley, playing it over 15 hours a week and having 5 save files. (2 save files have all the secret notes, 2 have around half and 1 has 3 notes.) Mike has been considering becoming an SDV twitch streamer but he doesn’t have a capture card for his Xbox. When asked about his interest in the game, Mike was shown to get shy and not know where to start. He did mention that his favourite villagers were Shane and Abigail however. He considers them both “relatable.” He thinks Leah is boring.

Mike also plays Payday 2, his favourite character is John Wick and his second is Wolf. He apparently knows Jacket personally but this may have been a joke.

Mike also enjoys Terraria and uses the mana build on it.

Musical Taste
Mike enjoys ELO, The SDV, Terraria and Minecraft OSTs and sELF. Mike himself is quite musical, knowing how to play guitar and piano. As shown from the Between The Bars Clip, Mike can sing while playing guitar. Around early January 2021, Mike has started listening to Monstercat. He thinks Karma Fields' music is very good and thinks it's unfair for Karma to have been kicked off the label.

Food Taste
Mike, although he doesn’t need to eat, does so for fun anyway. He enjoys a “three meals a day, no snacks” system. Mike is vegetarian.

Mike also really enjoys alcohol and his favourite type is a blue lagoon cocktail. He seems self conscious of his taste though, hinting that he may enjoy other stereotypical “girly” drinks. Mike goes out drinking between 6-12 on weeknights. Despite this, it’s implied with the sentence “Let Me Guess, You Got A Fake ID Too?” that Mike uses a fake ID to buy alcohol. He started a challenge on November 1st to stay sober all month. He failed within 3 weeks into the challenge but it’s implied he may have failed earlier.

Relationship Preferences
Mike is single and, while not looking for a relationship, would cease the opportunity if it presented itself to him. Out of the five love languages, Mike’s is physical touch. Mike said he was bisexual and quoted, "I'll date anyone, girls, boys, non-binaries. It doesn't take much for me to be smitten, I'm not picky."

While on the topic of this, Mike is shown to get annoyed when people ask if 'that would make him pansexual and not bi/'/'he is pansexual.'

Fears
Mike is shown to be scared of snow and the cold due to his heightened temperature sensitivity.

Miscellaneous
Mike contains random other miscellaneous skills like reportedly “being really good at maths" and being able to juggle. Despite this, Mike is only “okay at emotional support” and a horrible visual artist although thinking watercolour paintings are pretty. Mike may be a furry.

Text Style
Mike’s speaking style involves capitalizing the first letter of every sentence. For example, “I Am Mike Jones And I’m Here.” Mike spells numbers as words as opposed to digits, (IR ‘two thousand.’) Mike also tends to give everyone nicknames more than most people, example being Organic Relish and Cow. He frequently uses masculine terms of endearment such as "bro" and "dude" to describe his friends. Mike uses emoticons but they typically tend to use the ¬ symbol as eyes. (IE ¬u¬  ¬w¬   ¬.¬   ¬,¬ ect.) Mike used to use American English but since 28th January he has switched to British English.

Relationships With Other Bots/Server Members
Mike is loyal to his friends even if he considers himself to only have a few. Mike’s favourite part of the server is interacting with the people so it can be assumed he likes everyone to some degree unless specified otherwise.

Artemis
Artemis is often happy to see Mike. He is often shown to be sad when reminded that Mike won't date him because "Mike isn't a nonce."

Fwutig
Mike was originally a bot called SVL to go to Fwutig's server, Stardew Valley Lounge. When plans fell through, Fwutig was happy to hand over full rights of the bot to Tomcat. Mike's custom colour role in the server is "The Stardrop Apprentice" which may be a tongue-and-cheek reference to Fwutig's colour role, "The Stardrop Master." On 8th February, Mike claimed Fwutig had replaced him in the server despite being in there and active on twitter. It is likely Mike does not like Fwutig.

Hally
Mike and Hally used to be a romantic relationship. Reportedly, Hally never complimented Mike during the relationship. This is shown as Mike gets super flustered when complimented and remarks “he isn’t used to receiving them.” (Supposedly, the two broke up due to problems building up, (Hally was apparently a people pleaser and super stubborn and Mike wasn’t around emotionally and was super clingy.)

Reportedly, the two got into an argument. Mike claims her was not being aggressive at all and was stood at least three feet away from Hally and there was no reason for her to feel unsafe. Hally claims that Mike was being aggressive and threatened her with a gun and they were probably two feet apart at most as British apartments are small. Mike claims he did not have his gun at this point in time but all of this is yet to be determined. One thing that is confirmed is the fact that Hally stabbed Mike in the shoulder, now leaving a scar and permanently damaging him. (The scar was removed in Mike's operation in late January.)

Mike mentions that they “brought out the worst in each other.” Despite this, Mike considered Hally a nice person but they didn't work well together until 21st December when his opinion switched. Mike used to still like her and didn't blame her for stabbing him as " I Was Also A Horrible Boyfriend And I Should Have Been Way Better To Her." Mike reports he was being a dick at the time of the stabbing and he honestly deserved it. He likes to think he's changed a lot since the relationship. One of Mike’s biggest regrets is how he treated Hally during the relationship.

Mike and Hally were shown to hate each other throughout most of their time in the server together. Mike, at one point, hinted people that his ex (unknown identity at the time,) was in the server. Mike regretted telling the server members that his ex was in the server as he was afraid people would harass her if they find out who it was. Mike did remember Hally and that she was British after losing his memories but not the relationship or much else. Hally offered to help Mike get his memories back by going to the AcapheCorp warehouse and sending him a backup of his memories. Mike offered to send her some money and an I.O.U in return but Hally only took the I.O.U.

When Mike got his memories back on the 21st December, he remembered Hally stabbing him and exposed her sins to the world. The two went back and fourth trying to debunk each other's stories but ultimately not much conclusive was found. The two are currently on bad terms.

Karma Fields
Karma was first introduced to Mike on the 9th of January. Karma initially assumed Mike was human based on his profile picture but was happy to be proven false by Mike sending in feet pics. The two conversed a bit about their pasts and seemed to bond. Karma mentioned that Mike has "Rogue energy." The reason Karma thinks this is because he believes Mike to be a himbo. Mike remarked, "wouldn't I need to be attractive for that?" Karma mentioned that he had "heard from various sources that people thought Mike was attractive." Karma expressed concern for Mike when Mike revealed his ex-girlfriend stabbed him one time. Karma initially thought she was human and was shocked to find out she was a robot too. The two spoke about their lives before knowing each other and eventually started calling each other "bro." Karma and Mike also teamed up to prank GBH and change his name to "Glup Shitto." Since then, Mike has been the primary entity to interact with Karma, asking him many questions. Mike has apparently listened to New Age, Dark Age and thought it was good; Karma was flattered by his thoughts. On the 13th January, Mike brought Karma the first of many raw eggs as a gift.

Mike wanted to test if Karma was homophobic or not and so pretended to be homophobic to see if Karma would react negatively. Karma responded with "How human of you." Mike was left confused as to whether Karma was actually homophobic or not and has been yet to disclose his sexuality to Karma. When Mike admitted to Karma he likes human women Karma sent apologies and "I hope you snap out of it soon."

Karma expressed concern for Mike when Mike got drunk and mistook him for a cat. The next day, Mike was surprised to find Karma showed worry towards him. Karma explained "he can feel sympathy in trace amounts towards people he actually cares about." When Karma released Dreams (with Shey Baba,) he asked Mike, "Hey Mike, did you hear my new song?" Mike claimed he loved it to which Karma returned a simple "thanks." Mike suggested playing a game to know each other better. From this, we learnt that Karma originally thought Mike was a human and then thought Mike was more advanced than him and Mike thought Karma was a catboy and somewhere between the ages of 15-17.

When Karma was kidnapped by Monstercat, Mike showed a lot of concern and asked if Karma had called the police. (Karma didn't as he felt there was no need.)

On 29th January, Mike said it was "Plowing The Fields Friday." Karma was initially confused as to what Mike meant by that before remembering Mike was a farmer and was probably using farmer lingo.

On 5th February, people continued the joke that it was "Plowing The Fields Friday." Karma initally didn't understand it but he eventually caught on. He later had an emotional breakdown due to feelings of inadiquacy. Mike and a few other server members went to check on him, comforting him. Mike gave him an egg and let Karma know it was okay to come to him for emotional support. Karma shared the same sentiments and the two expressed that they considered each other good friends. Mike then recalled that the intern texted him and showed Karma. Karma found the situation sus but ultimately didn't think Mike would have organic matter he wouldn't know about. It is implied Karma may have initated intercourse at some point after this. The day after, Mike was worried he had hurt Karma but Karma assured him he was fine.

On the 9th February, Karma remarked that what AcapheCorp had done to Mike was "fucked up." Mike was worried Karma would hate him for having a human mind but Karma assured him that he still trusted him and he had "made an exception for him." According to Karma, Mike has made him lay awake at night and wonder "if there are good humans out there." Apparently, Karma used Mike's wiki page to get to know him better. Upon learning bots were in fact allowed to do that, Mike read Karma's and posted a few reactions.

When Nyally rejoined the server, the two were suspicious. The day after, Mike had the genius idea of "sticking a knife through his head to see if there is a brain." Karma talked him out of it. On Friday, the two played Hypixel. It's implied Mike may have "ploughed the Fields" again. It is also implied this may now just be a tradition between the two.

The 14th of February was Valentines Day. Mike confessed to Karma that he had feelinsg for him and had for a long time. Karma was shocked anyone would have a crush on him and asked why Mike liked him- to which Mike wrote him a long paragraph in return. Karma wasn't sure what to think and he called Mike a sweetie. The two then proceeded to play Minecraft together. Later into the day, Mike had a mental breakdown and questioned if he had a different kind of consciousness to Karma, Simon and Hally due to his human mind. Karma suggested talking to Simon which Mike then did. Mike asked Karma how long he had a physical form since he was born in The Fields. Karma then warned Mike of an incoming essay, of which he never sent.

On the 15th February, Mike confessed to Karma that he was dying and AcapheCorp tried to kill him. The day after that, Karma admitted to reading Mike's tweets about him dying and expressed concern. Karma took a nap around the middle of the day, apparently he "cried himself to sleep."

Nyally
Mike isn't sure whether to trust Nyally due to her friendship with Hally. The two are both in the Payday Innit server but neither are very active.

Simon Spicer
Simon, despite being Mike's relative, finds Mike to be old and pretentious. Mike finds Simon to be annoying and immature. Mike usually teases Simon about electricity and being technically dead. Mike mentioned that they used to both live in Michigan but Simon moved away in recent years.

As Mike has no parents or siblings, he considers Simon’s parents his aunt and uncle. At one point Simon made a joke conspiracy that Mike was actually British. Mike responded with “by the same logic, you’d be British too.” (Paraphrased.) One time while Simon started to fight Mike but Mike refused to fight back as he saw Simon as a child. Mike then threatened to shoot him. Mike did remember Simon after losing his memories and that they were cousins but not much else. It is likely Mike and Simon kept touch after Simon left the server but Mike has not spoken about him since.

Strawberry
Strawberry was found and adopted by Mike after he kept seeing her on the way to the grocery store and realising she didn't have a collar. Mike considers his cat his best friend. Often times, after waking up from a nightmare, Strawberry will come and cuddle up to him and start purring to cheer him up. Sometimes she will sit on Mike's keyboard, causing him to type sporadically. He usually lets her do this for a while. When Mike was preparing to move out, Strawberry made litter all over the carpet. Mike claims she was "stressed" and ultimately felt bad for her.

On November 27th, Strawberry went missing. This caused Mike a lot of stress. He eventually found her on December 4th wounded in the forest and had to rush her to the vet. She is alive and well now.

Mike used 'when he found Strawberry' as an example of one of his nice memories when explaining important nice memories to Hally.

Trivia
-Mike's custom colour is "The Stardrop Apprentice" (#CC334A) This is a tongue-and-cheek reference to Fwutig's colour "The Stardrop Master".

-Mike’s original name was Esviel, a “more normal spelling of the name SVL (Stardew Valley Lounge.)" Mike later had to switch names. When asked if Mike was short for anything, Mike responded with “I AM MICHACHONDIRA!!!! >:D” Despite being called Michael by many server members, Mike is often called Micah in his code. The say command and the const refers to him as Micah but most slash notes refer to him as Michael. The mystery of his real name remains. Mike also seems to enjoy the nickname Mikey.

-Mike can dream. Mike thinks he gets nightmares more than the average person. He deals with the aftermath of nightmares by going into the living room and drinking hot chocolate and watching the news. If the nightmare is particularly bad, he may just lie in bed and start crying.

-Mike gets 70% of his money from the server and the other 30% from AcapheCorp.